I've recently been re-reading one my favorite books on taking 100% responsibility for everything that happens in your life. Something I strongly believe in. And as someone who's busy with these kinds of topics on a daily basis, I surely should be applying this concept to the fullest. Right?
Or so I thought. It's been a while now since I've not managed to write another post here. I've been wanting to. Really. But have delayed the execution of it. Why? Well, here is my 'story': I've been fairly busy over the last weeks, welcoming our second child into our home, getting little sleep, working full time and developing some new projects.
But I also had the time to take 10 days of holidays, play golf and tennis, read books, watch episodes of 'Friends', and go to different parties. But that, my 'story' says, it's an absolute must to take my mind off and recover. I need sufficient breaks in order to perform. It may be true, but does it justify not writing an article that takes approximately 1 hour to write?
The truth is I was not taking 100% responsibility for not writing this latest article. I have let external circumstances decide over my capacity to write. "I'll do it later when I sleep better, when things get quieter, ...". But the truth is that I made up excuses to justify the lack of courage to sit for one hour in front of my computer and get it out.
It takes a fair amount of willpower to start from a blank page, certainly if you're tired of a busy period in your life. It's easier to put the blame on the heavy program or on the new baby.
Like this story, you and I have many different 'stories' to justify some of our behaviors. We convince ourselves that it's not our fault, that we should not feel guilty about not doing those things that are hard to do and we should be doing.
““The things that are hard to do, are exactly the things that are most valuable for you” ”
You'll easily recognize this kind of stories because they start typically with "You know it's not easy, .... " or "I wish I had the time to..." followed by a long list of excuses.
The problem with taking full responsibility is that it is super scary. There is no one else to blame! It's you and only you. You decide to act or not act. No outside circumstances, excuses, angry bosses we can use to hide? That absolutely terrifying! But also very liberating. It means you're in control. Any moment, like me and this article, you can choose to take action and do something about it.
And once you do, you'll realize that your stories, were, in fact, nothing more than a set of fears you were running away from... and that after all it was not that bad... if only we would take this very first step in the right direction..
So, what's the story you're using to run from the things you don't want to do? And what if you would take 100% responsibility for it and would take this little first step today?! How good would you feel tonight?
““If you want to create the life of your dreams then you are going to have to take 100% responsibility for your life as well. That means giving up all your excuses, all your victim stories, all the reasons why you can’t and haven’t up until now, and all your blaming of outside circumstances. You have to give them all up, forever.You have to take the position that you have always had the power to make it different, to get it right, to produce the desired result.
This includes the level of your achievements, the results you produce, the quality of your relationships, the state of your health, your income, your feelings — EVERYTHING!””